Ox Cars

Briefly:

I hate the Oscars, and always expect the worst. Having said that, --

I'm glad the Academy took a big, steaming dump on James Cameron by giving his ex nearly every award they could. He has everybody's money, he doesn't need our approval, too. Also, I always like it when the lady wins.

I'm glad Jeff Bridges won, even though I didn't see the movie, and won't, because I don't give a shit about country music. Jeff Bridges is unarguably a great actor, and this sounded like a plumb role, and so why not give him a best actor for it. I loved Colin Firth to pieces in A Single Man, but if I were Colin Firth, I don't think I'd even feel bad about this.

I'm glad Christoph Walz won for Inglorious Basterds, because that was a genuinely good movie that Academy types weren't officially allowed to like, and it needed to win *something*. And although it was good for many reasons, Christoph Walz was the biggest one. I mean, damn, he was good.

I'm glad that The Cove won for best Documentary, because, seriously? Japanese people? What the fuck. You deserve the bother.

I'm glad that Avatar won a couple of awards that nobody outside the industry cares about, because I suppose it probably needed to win something, and it makes it harder for James Cameron to cry about how he was robbed.

I'm not at all glad, not one little bit, that Sandra Bullock won any award for anything that she was up against HELEN MIRREN and MERYL FUCKING STREEP for. I don't have anything against Sandra Bullock, I even kind of like her even though she's never in good movies, but come on. Helen Mirren is awesome and deserves Oscars for movies she wasn't even in. Meryl Streep is awesome and deserves Oscars for being alive, and for playing Julia Childs. Actually, anyone who can get casted to play Julia Childs in anything deserves an Oscar for awesomeness, because *Julia Fucking Childs.*

Also, you can't give Sandra Bullock an Oscar against Gabourey Sidibe who deserves one for being a better-than-anyone-in-the-academy-or-the-audience-for-that-matter human being. Come on. Helen Mirren. Meryl Streep, and Gabourey Sidibe, and you give Sandra Bullock the award? Oh. I don't even know who Carey Mulligan is.